


Myth

by psychemenace



Category: K (Anime)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-23
Updated: 2017-12-23
Packaged: 2019-02-19 06:30:05
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,838
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13118007
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/psychemenace/pseuds/psychemenace
Summary: There is a myth that at a certain point in life, an Angel comes down to earth tasked to  give a chance to humans to do the things they haven’t done yet in life. Mikoto finds this absurd, but one day he discovers for himself that myths are passed down from generation to generation for a reason.





	Myth

 

Soft.

That was the first thing Mikoto thought.

He moved his hand and ran his fingers on the surface of what he imagined to be plumes, feeling the soft fractals of its veins and the threads that comprise the feathers.

Soft. Feather soft. He thought again.

Lazy eyes opened, and saw dark majestic wings taking up most of the space inside the room. Mikoto blinked twice, thrice to make sure he wasn’t dreaming. When he was able to gather himself, he turned on his side and  saw someone curled up beside him, almost naked. Hair of dark velvet streamed across the futon. A portion of the face hidden from his sight as delicate hands perched on the pillow they both shared. The stranger’s body curled beside him forming a C. Bony knees near the chest made the other look like a baby. The presence of the stranger surprised him. He didn’t know him and it made him feel cautious.

Mikoto lazily sat up gazing all the while at the sleeping stranger. Annoyed, he pushed the wide wing that covered his whole body away to make space. Gazing at the man sleeping beside him, he narrowed his lazy eyes and sighed.

Rather than wake the other up, Mikoto went back to sleep.

—

From the haze of sleep came the sound of a voice that was deep and soothing and a touch on his arm. Mikoto opened his eyes and found himself looking into violet orbs and hair falling down right at his face. The gleam of the sun perked up like a ball behind the strangers back. The silvery tinkle of the wind chimes made everything seem like a dream. He blinked. It was like gazing at an angel. Then, he frowned. He wanted to curse the person, angel or not. Remembering something, he sat right up, and fought back the languor in his limbs.

“Suoh Mikoto is it?” The other person said matter of factly. 

Mikoto scanned the room. There were black feathers scattered all over with orb-like shining things. They were fading. There was no majestic dark wing in sight. He focused his sight on the person that was before him and studied him carefully.

The stranger was sitting formally: sitting on his legs, back straight as if he was one of those men who worked for the military. His shoulders were wide; his abdomen flat. There was no thatch of hair that decorated his navel. Nothing snaked down to hide the root of his cock that limped between his legs. It was not the first time that Suoh Mikoto saw a naked man before. And yet, he was still shocked at the sight of this person looking at him with those eyes that were serious and had a playful gleam.

“I’m here on an errand from Her Highness.” He paused, adjusting his glasses.

“I am to inquire about the things that you haven’t done yet Suoh Mikoto, and make sure that you do them before your time is up.”

Mikoto’s eyes widened. So what Anna said was true indeed. He smirked and flopped down on the futon.

“Go back.”

“Pardon?”

“I said go back.” Mikoto drawled turning away from the man.

“I am afraid I cannot do that without completing my task.”

A pause.

“And even if I leave, I cannot do that until I finish what I was tasked to do, nor can you drive me away. A pact has been formed between us.”

Mikoto turned and stared at the other.

“I’m Munakata Reishi. And I’ll accompany you for a month.”

Mikoto furrowed his eyebrows and cluck his tongue. He had an inkling that he was about to get involved in something troublesome.

Reishi moved closer and nodged Mikoto by the shoulder. He handed him a paper and a pen.

“Write here the things that you wish to do within that period of time. Time is of the essence. This might be a surprise to you, but you should do it before it’s too late.”

It was a weird thing to go along with something one found ridiculous. Whether or not he found this stupid, Mikoto just stared at the paper. He sighed in resignation, took the paper and the pen like he had no choice.

“The third drawer from the top. Clothes. Put some on.”

Reishi smiled.

—-

 

The paper that he held in his hand fluttered in his grasp.

A waft of smoke hovered right at the tip of his cigarette. Suoh Mikoto took a drag as he stared at the paper  in his hand confused and hesitant about what he was supposed to do. He thought deeply about what to write, but he couldn’t think of anything. In his twenty something years of existence in this world, Suoh Mikoto never really thought of the things that he wanted to do in his life, more so the things he hadn’t yet done in his life. He never really pondered about any thing at all. Tired, he put the pen and paper inside his drawer and pressed his cigarette on his ash tray. 

_One month huh?_ _One month left._ He smiled as if he already resigned to the fact that it’s really the end of the line. It wouldn’t hurt if he just did what the stranger wanted him to do.

Thinking that he had nothing to lose, Mikoto wrote in a messy handwriting,

  1. Falling in love.
  2. Skiing
  3. Visit the Fushimi Inari shrine.



He handed the paper to Reishi who was checking himself out on the mirror.

“Only three?”

“It’s only for  a month.”

“It’s fine then.”

 

—-

 

“I researched about skiing resorts and it is said that one of Japan’s popular resorts is in Akita. We  can spend two or three days there if you like. I already found some possible places where we can stay as well as the probable places we can go to for you to enjoy your stay. I presume you like skiing? I marked one of the best resorts there just for you Suoh.”

Mikoto frowned.

“Mmm.”

Apathetic, Mikoto lied down, arms behind his head. He perched his other leg on top of his right and closed his eyes. Reishi was getting a little bit pissed at his behavior. Continuing, Reishi talked about their transportation as Mikoto was in the middle of drifting off to sleep. The other’s voice was getting hazy, hypnotic as his consciousness slip away.

“Suoh..” Reishi asked, taking him back from his slumber. His body involuntarily jerked at the other’s touch. He turned to him annoyed; looking at him over furrowed brows.

“I have decided to schedule our trips to both Akita and Fushimi Inari early. But…” Reishi paused.

“I am having difficulties as regards to the number one on your list—falling in love. I have no idea of what this thing called love is. I may not be able to help you with this without you teaching me about it.

“We often talked about you humans. From what I've gathered, love is something that you share with someone. I have never delved much into this matter, so I would like to ask for your assistance.”

“Mmm. ” Mikoto thought purposely. His lazy eyes drifting from side to side.

Laughter bubbled in the air, and the paper screen doors were slid rather harshly.

“Mikoto!” A little girl said in monotone as she ran towards Mikoto and glomped him.

“Hey Anna! Wait up.” A redheaded child ran breathless towards their direction, dragging with him a tired looking boy in glasses.

“You’re slow Misaki!”

“Mikoto-san!” The boy named Misaki said, flashing his pearly white teeth. He rushed to Mikoto and hugged him too leaving his companion behind.

Lovingly, Mikoto patted them on the head. Noticing Fushimi’s souring mood, he paused and beckoned Fushimi to him. Fushimi, shy, just frowned and lumbered towards him; his mouth in a pout with eyebrows furrowed. Mikoto smiled and stood up to take something from the fridge. He took three rectangle things, then gave them to the kids. It was chocolate. It made the kids happy. Their faces lit up when Mikoto handed them their treat, even Fushimi’s brightened.

Reishi was just there studying them as they interacted. From where he came from, they didn't have this camaraderie. He tucked his hand under his chin and thought purposely. Mikoto noticed and stared at him dumbfounded.

_What is he up to now?_

Giving up on the matter of his companion’s weirdness, he went into the kitchen and started cooking.

Mikoto didn't really cook. He was forced to learn one or two recipes to cook for the kids because he can’t rely all the time on Old Granny next door’s cooking that is why seeing him prepare the vegetables and other ingredients made Reishi’s brows rise.

It was a mess as he tried to cut the onions and the garlic as instructed by the cooking book he opened.  His eyes hurt. As a reflex, he rubbed them. The burning feeling and the tears settling in his eyes distracted him;  accidentally he cut himself and cursed softly. Reishi noticed that he was having a hard time so he sauntered towards him. Curious, Reishi leaned in and checked what Mikoto was doing. He crossed his arms over his chest. The smell that wafted teased him. He flared his nose. The metallic scent coming from the fire as it blazed under the casserole, the sound of the bubbling of the water was something new to Reishi’s senses.  

“What are you lookin’ at?”

“You’re not very good at this Suoh Mikoto.” Reishi said as he observed Mikoto’s awkward way of cutting and arranging the ingredients.

Mikoto cluck his tongue in frustration and huffed.

“Fuck.” Mikoto cursed softly so that the kid’s won’t hear.

“Mikoto-san, Izumo-san asked if it was really okay for you to be left alone with us. What do I say?” Misaki inquired pausing for a bite.

Reishi walked towards little Misaki. He crouched so that he would be eye to eye with the kid. He stole a glance at Mikoto and then smiled at little Misaki.  

“Child tell him, Suoh Mikoto is absolutely fine.”

Misaki gazed at Reishi with a puzzled expression. His almond eyes looked him up and down. The space between the child’s eyebrows creased as time passed by. His face said that he didn't like Reishi one bit.

“And who are you Mr?” Misaki admonished, haughty, as though he was being possessive over his Mikoto-san. Little Fushimi at the far off corner flitted his eyes towards Misaki and quietly looked away as he ate. Anna scooted close to him and nudged him with her elbow. Anna whispered something into Fushimi’s ear. It was something that made Fushimi fluster and pout.

“Oh, I’m…” Reishi was about to say something when he felt Mikoto cover his mouth and drag him back to the kitchen.

 

—-

 

Mikoto just finished tucking the kids to bed when he heard something in the kitchen. He found Reishi in an apron, cooking.

“What’s this?”

“I was looking at the recipes and decided to try different things to cook for you. Here taste this.”

Mikoto’s eyes grew wide as he tasted the soup that Reishi made.

“Is it to your liking?”

Mikoto looked away, sat heavily on the floor, spread his legs lazily, and waited for more.

“Yeah.”

“Yeah.” Mikoto repeated. The taste made him think of home.

—

 

The sound of wood being hit by a sharp object was the first thing that was heard that morning. The kids were still asleep. Reishi was sitting on the   _engawa_ observing Mikoto who was making firewood for the bath. He looked healthy. Reishi wondered that people’s look sometimes mislead.

Reishi stole glances on the wounds in Mikoto’s hands. He was curious. He never felt pain before.  He thought that he was not prepared for this job because he knew too little about humans, and he had difficulty in trying to understand their emotions, their feelings, and the things that they think about.  They were instructed to help humans do what  they wished to do before they pass. This was his first time doing such a job. He had never interacted with the others who were experienced. All of these made him think that he may never know what Mikoto thought.

When Mikoto finished chopping wood, he went inside the house, washed his hands and flopped beside Reishi on the engawa overlooking the garden. He drank the mineral water that he just got from the fridge thirstily. Adjusting his glasses on the bridge of his nose, Reishi was overcome by the need to look at Mikoto’s hands that were placed near him. As he gazed at the bandages that were wrapped around the fingers, he couldn't help but place his hand on top of Mikoto’s hand. Mikoto turned to him with an empty expression and pulled his hand slightly away. Reishi clipped a finger in between his thumb and index finger to stop him from pulling away.  

“Do you mind if I look?”

Mikoto relaxed and allowed Reishi to lift his hands. It had been a long time since Mikoto was touched so gently like how Reishi touched him currently. Reishi took his hand in his and scooted close. Mikoto stared at him swallowing a lump in his throat as Reishi bridged the distance between them. Reishi was focused on his hand. He wasn't aware of the fact that their shoulders were already brushing against each other. He wasn't aware of Mikoto’s loud heartbeat.

Reishi felt the contours of Mikoto’s hand; he turned it so that the palm was up. Some of Mikoto’s cuts were visible. There were red gashes that were painted on his fingers. His hands were rough and large. The tips of his fingertips that peaked out of the bandage had thick skin. The feel of Mikoto’s calloused hands was something that interested Reishi. He had a feeling of wanting to place it on the side of his face to feel its warmth. He didn’t know what that feeling meant, but it was a curious thing. To touch is to feel. Does he want to feel Mikoto?

He was curious about a lot of things every since he came to human world and one of these things was Mikoto. He wanted to know _something_ about this man who he’s going to guide through the passing. He wondered whether or not the others felt like this too while at work. Did they also wonder about the things that he thought of? Shaking such thoughts off, he noticed the red patches on Mikoto’s palm. They looked like burns.

“Did it hurt?”

Mikoto replied, “not much.”

Without any second thought, Reishi brought Mikoto's hand to his mouth and kissed it. Mikoto was caught off guard.

“Oya? What’s with that expression? I watch in more than one film that you’d cure pain through kisses. I was just checking if it was true or not.”

Mikoto thought how silly Reishi was for believing something stupid as the films that he watched to study more about human behaviour. Mikoto wondered what kind of films he watched.

Mikoto  took his hand away.

Reishi wondered why Mikoto wasn’t responding to his kindness. It perplexed Reishi why Mikoto reacted like that to him. He told himself that he was going to study more.

 

\---

 

“Reishi.” Anna peaked at Reishi as he was hanging out in the _engawa_ overlooking the garden drinking his tea.

“What’s is it Anna-kun?”

Anna sauntered towards him and sat beside him.

“Is there something wrong with Mikoto? Are you going to take him away?” Anna could see faint dark wings on Reishi’s back. She clung to him, making the cloth of his kimono wrinkle in her grasp.

“Don’t take Mikoto away.” Anna frowned.

Reishi placed his hand on top of Anna’s head making Anna raise her head to look at him.

“You are like those people who comes to take the one we love away right? Like the myth teacher told us?”

Reishi only smiled. He couldn’t do anything but smile. He could feel that Anna was uneasy. And the way she gripped on his clothes made him think that this might be the infamous emotion of sadness humans call when they encounter something painful.

“Reishi, don’t you feel anything? Like love?”

“Love. Hmmm. I confess that personally I have never encountered such a thing. But based on the films that Suoh Mikoto allowed me to watch, I know it involves embracing and care.” At this Reishi paused.

“Care is.. the feeling you have for someone who is dear. The need to protect envelops your whole being when the special someone is in danger, or if not, the need to serve them arise from within the lover.”

Anna blinked and flashed a crescent smile.

“You’re weird.”

Reishi pulled Anna for an embrace. He pet her head and was conscious of  Anna’s beating heart. He knew the child loved Mikoto very much. The kids loved him very much, and it was painful to think about how it would crush them when Mikoto leaves.

Anna blushed a little at the gesture. She liked Reishi. She liked how the mysterious man balanced the violence that Mikoto can be capable of; the violence that even he can inflict upon himself.

On that day, Anna promised to herself that she was going to teach Reishi all about love. It was hard for Reishi to comprehend the feeling though. Somehow, he understood that it did not only mean care and affection, it also meant wanting to touch and be touched by the beloved. Since then, he had been preoccupied by this need of human beings to touch. Their need to find someone they love. The need of humans for companionship perturbed him. Angels didn't go in pairs. They were on their own, completing each of their tasks. This characteristic of humans interested him. It made him close to Mikoto, a little bit by  trying to understanding him.

 

\---

 Time flies so fast. Mikoto thought.

He stared at the paper where he had written his wishes. It was funny looking at it. He wondered whether he would be able to say the things that he wanted to say. He put the paper away and went to his room. Inside the little enclosure, Reishi was sitting in the traditional style leaning over a book over a _chabudai_. He was reading a recipe book again. When Reishi noticed his presence, Reishi raised his eyes to him. Those violet eyes bore into Mikoto’s as though reading his thoughts.  Mikoto looked away as he slid the screen doors closed.

“Aren’t you tired?” Mikoto drawled.

“You’re still up?” Reishi smiled and continued, “We don’t get tired. Besides, the children like my cooking very much. You don't have to do them yourself Suoh Mikoto.”

As he closed the book, he couldn’t help but feel a little bit conscious of himself. It was making his heart race at the thought that he was waiting for Mikoto to come back before he rests. Swallowing a lump in his throat, Reishi crawled toward Mikoto. He craned his neck and pulled Mikoto down to sit beside him. He took his hand and kissed it. Mikoto frowned. He never felt comfortable when Reishi did this. Reishi patted his thighs.

“Come sleep on my lap. I’ll massage your head.”

Mikoto obeyed and lied on Reishi lap. He stared at him for a while thinking that what if he blinked and  Reishi would disappear. It made him feel a bit sad just thinking about it. Gazing at Reishi, he thought of how warm the other’s smile is.

You can’t always get what you want. Mikoto thought. You can’t always wish for something impossible right?

He was satisfied with just this; with just the memories. Mikoto closed his eyes. Gentle fingers massaged his forehead, running through his scalp, painting whirlpools on his skin like saying I love yous in the dark.

Reishi’s touch relaxed him. It send him a warm sensation. The pressure that the other applied drove his stress away. Mikoto opened his eyes, furrowed his eyebrows and parted his mouth to say something, but he could say nothing. He swallowed a lump in his throat and felt weird feeling the things that he was feeling. The chilly night air wasn’t helping. He wished Reishi closed the screen doors connected to the back of the garden. He wished that the night wasn’t as quiet as it was. The wail of the cicada’s didn’t help to fend off his unease. The cold wind that caressed his cheek and Reishi’s warmth made him wonder about a lot of things. If Reishi was a heavenly being, then why was he so warm? Possessed by the need to just feel Reishi, Mikoto pressed his lips together and raised his hand to touch Reishi’s cheek.

“Why d’you feel so real?” He drawled.

 It’s just the back of Mikoto’s finger that was on his cheek, but it was enough yo surprise Reishi. Mikoto never touched him, so this was something that was out of the ordinary. Reishi flustered a little bit. It was a new feeling for the Angel. He held Mikoto’s hand and leaned on it, as if to emphasize how real he was. He smiled.

“I am flesh and blood when we are in this form.”

“I know.”

Gently, Mikoto caressed Reishi’s face. He knew it well. He knew it from the very marrows of his bones; from instinct, that Reishi was flesh and blood; real; a warm body next to him.

“Warm.” Mikoto crooned as Reishi’s warmth continued to burn him. He closed his eyes, withdrew his hand, and asked,

 

“How many days left?”

 

——

“So how’s your trip so far, Mikoto?” Izumo asked over the phone. He already arrived so Mikoto finally went on a trip with Reishi.

“Fine.”

“Enjoy yourself. The kids can’t wait ’til they hear your stories of ..”

“Yeah. yeah”

Mikoto dropped the call.

“Who was that?”

“Izumo. Checking if I was havin’ fun.”

“Hmm.” Reishi smiled playfully. “Of course Suoh Mikoto. You will have fun. I assure you that.”

The trip to Akita was long. When they arrived, all Mikoto could see were snow covering everything. The place reminded him of the stories of his father. How much his father liked this place. The skiing, the wind in your lungs when you glide down the slope. Strong arms clutching the ski gear in desperation to speed up until you reached your destination. The sight of the pine trees; the gleaming sun above your head, were things his Father constantly talked about, embedding how Akita would look like in Mikoto’s brain.

When Mikoto snapped out of his reverie,  Reishi was nowhere to be found. He probably was asking things about what transportation to take. Mikoto wheeled around in search for him. Finally he saw him talking to an officer at the station. Reishi glanced at him, then looked away and addressed the officer again. He bowed to the officer and walked to Mikoto. He explained about the transportation in a detailed manner. Mikoto was getting tired listening at how carefully planned their whole trip was.

“… and when we arrive at the inn..”

“Yeah, yeah.”

—-

 

They were going to be in the same room. Mikoto was expecting that this time, he wouldn’t be. For the reason that, sometimes they get into petty fights. Reishi was unbearable. He did things in a way that pissed Mikoto off. Sometimes he was too close for comfort, making Mikoto feel extremely conscious of the fact Reishi wasn’t aware of distance, or of personal space. Eyes gleaming as he talked about stuff that wasn’t that interesting like Glasses shops, bars and his curiosity about Ninjas ever since he watched a period drama, Mikoto was convinced that indeed he was not from this world and they should not be constantly together just to be safe.  He had no choice though. He sighed, lied down on the bed, and slept.

 

—

 

Waking up in darkness, Mikoto groaned as he felt something heavy on him. He sat up carefully, finding out in the process that Reishi turned into a little version of himself again. His kimono was very loose on him. Mikoto rolled his eyes and lifted Reishi up by his clothes.

“Munakata..” He poked his cheek. Reishi didn’t move. He was fast asleep, curled up against Mikoto’s chest, small hands balled into fists. He remembered that he told him once that in the afternoon they were weak so to preserve their power, they turn into miniature versions of themselves _._ It required a lot of spiritual power to keep their wings hidden so they need to recharge.

It was a rare occurence for Mikoto to be awake when Reishi was in this form, so he couldn’t help but gaze at Reishi's face. His eyes, he just found out, had a nice slant to it. His lashes were long. His hair that shaped his cute little face was silky and soft. Mikoto wondered about angels and about death, about the one month myth Anna told him about.

He thought of Reishi’s cooking. He thought about a lot of things. Maybe it was because Reishi was tasked to guide him through; maybe it was because his task was to appease him. That must be why the cooking was exactly like how he wanted. It was something that made him soften himself towards the angel. He may be unbearable at times because of his being dutiful, and his need to do things with exactitude and perfection. Him being a busy body. But what got Mikoto was the way he gets curious just like a child.  This childishness sometimes aroused in Mikoto a feeling of being protective over Reishi. He had not felt that feeling for a long time already. It soothed him to feel it again, making him wonder whether there is a possibility to stop time from running and just make him stay like this with Reishi forever and make him feel the feelings that he thought he wouldn’t be able to feel ever again.

 

—-

 

The smell of ramen was sublime.

Mikoto woke up to its heavenly scent which made him immediately lumber out of his room, catching Reishi in the middle of tasting his cooking. Mikoto settled himself on the red _zabuton_ ready to eat. 

“Smells nice.”

“I cooked something especially for you. I also cooked maki and katsudon. It’s a feast tonight. We don’t have to order expensive food, but if you like, we can…”

“It’s fine. I love your cooking.”

Reishi was surprised at what Mikoto said. He didn’t expect that. Reishi cleared his throat to fend off whatever it was the hovered between them. He said his stiff “Itadakimasu” and they both ate.  

As they ate quietly, Mikoto wondered what Reishi was thinking. Was he able to find things out about humans through the movies that he watched with Mikoto?   Staring at Reishi through furrowed brows, he got distarcted looking at Reishi wearing his kimono in a manner that exposed bits of his chest.

Mikoto’s stare was making Reishi feel bothered. He just pretended he didn’t notice Mikoto’s glare. Mikoto on the other hand, was trying not to look at Reishi. The silence was thickening, and it was making things awkward for both of them.

“Suoh.”

“Munakata.”

They were both in sync.

Reishi cleared his throat.

“You go first Suoh.”

“It’s not important. You go first.”

“As you wish then,”

It embarrassed Reishi to try makinh conversation without any plan. He kept on jumping from one topic to another. It was clear in Mikoto’s face that he found the topics a bit out of this world but still, he didn’t mind talking.

Reishi began to understand deeper the reason why Mikoto was loved.

“Ah. What were you going to say again?”

Mikoto didn’t want to say to him that he would like Reishi to cook for him forever; if forever can be attained. So instead he said,

“Nothing.”

 

—-

 Skiing was an experience. 

Mikoto didn't have any problems learning its basics.

He slid his way into the slope, pushing himself, slowly fastening his pace as if he already got the hang of it. Wrapped up in layers of clothes, he still felt a bit cold. He was enjoying himself though. He thought how nice it would be if he went with his father.

The glistening sun shining over the snow capped hills was a reminder of what could have been. The brown of the trees sticking out from their blanket of snow was like a surprise every time he slid and rose up from the lumps. Reishi was following him behind.

They stopped. Mikoto felt refreshed. Reishi elegantly stopped beside him and lectured,

“ _Mattaku_. You don't know how not to be reckless, do you?”

“What, ‘ya worried?”

Mikoto smirked.

“You don't need to worry.” Mikoto said a bit arrogant. He was about to glide away when Reishi grabbed his arm.

“What now?”

“Well, I was just..”

A little bit annoyed, Mikoto brushed Reishi’s hand away but Reishi wouldn't let him go. As if reading Reishi’s mind, he sighed .

“I’ll slow down... if that’s what you want.”

Triumphant, Reishi smiled and glided away with style. Looking back at Mikoto as he skied at a distance, he waved happily, as though he triumphed over something, or _someone_. Mikoto was pissed. He smirked and skied to catch up to Reishi.

Reishi was surprisingly fast; it was making Mikoto really pissed off at himself because he's worked up. He’s never worked up.

Enjoying the advantage of distance, he made exhibitions: circling around a bush with grace and slightly jumping whenever he slid down a slope. Their guide followed them from behind shouting things that both couldn't hear that much.  Mikoto swerved and circled, pushed and pulled. Unable to take the fact that Reishi was ahead, he jumped at Reishi to make him stop.

The impact hurt. Reishi closed his eyes shut as Mikoto threw his whole body at him. They both fell, rolling on the snow like two children. Mikoto ended up on top of Reishi. Reishi glasses fell, he couldn't see that well so he squinted his eyes. He couldn’t move because Mikoto pinned his arms.

Mikoto blinked. He stared at Reishi. He studied him;  his eyes, that were dark blue so that it looked violet, his straight nose, and his luscious lips that looked soft as if asking for a kiss. As he stared at Reishi, he felt a feeling he was holding back rise from the depths of his consciousness. It made him feel bold and excited.

“Suoh,” Reishi said authoritatively, masking the feeling of awkwardness and shame of being cornered.

“Ne, Munakata... Wanna kiss?”

“Ki… what are you talking about?”

“Like in your films?”

“What do you..”

Golden brown eyes gazed at Reishi’s lips and then at his eyes then back to his mouth. He leaned in, opening his mouth slightly as he did it. Mikoto kissed him softly. Gentle and curt, with a sufficient sweetness. The sound of plopping of skin when Mikoto withdrew made the angel blush and his heart that beat but didn't have any sound become as loud as a bomb.

Mikoto tasted like cigarettes and bourbon. His cold mouth made Reishi feel hot at the touch of their lip. It was making him weak.

“You.. wondered about love. You need to know how to kiss first.” Mikoto stood up, took his skis and waited for Reishi to stand up. Their guide was already near.

A little bit pissed, Reishi grabbed his glasses and adjusted them angrily on the bridge of his nose. 

“Too can play at this game Suoh Mikoto. You just watch.”

 

—-

 

“How you’ve been Mikoto?”

“Fine.”

“You've been lovey dovey with that pretty companion of yours?”

Mikoto averted his eyes. He ruffled his hair and slumped on the futon. He furrowed his brows in annoyance.

“Shut up.”

Tone serious, Izumo asked, “Feelin’ alright?”

“Yeah. nothin’ wrong. I'm just tired. He’s cooking.”

Izumo chuckled over the phone.

“Oh, that's great. you two have fun all right!”

 

\---

 

Awkward silence.

Only the sound of sip and faint sound of chopsticks hitting the bowl could be heard.

Mikoto liked silence, but there was something that was heavy upon them. He was lazy to be the one to break the ice though, so it didn’t really matter to him that much. Although, it made him think about the kiss that he shared with Reishi. He shouldn't have kissed him, and yet he did, just because Reishi looked irresistible being underneath him like that, his hair all over the place, his furrowed brows; his surprised expression.

Shrugging off his thoughts he decided to buy sake.

“Sake?”

“Yeah.”

Reishi adjusted his glasses and stared.

“A rare mortal delicacy? hmm.”

Mikoto furrowed his brows lazily.

“All right.” Reishi assented.

They drank together quietly. Reishi was having trouble thinking of what to talk to Mikoto about. He didn't know what to talk about because he would always think of that kiss they shared. He stole glances at Mikoto pondering deeply about this phenomenon. He put down his sake cup and stared at his companion.

“What?” Mikoto said. Munakata's stare was making him feel self-conscious.

“I can't help but think about the kiss you gave me.”

Reishi’s honesty was something Mikoto can never not be surprised at.

“Hmm?”

“You tasted… like cigarettes.”

Mikoto was about to take a drag from his cigarette when Reishi said it. It made him pause with widened eyes.

“You tasted of the bourbon you just drank.

“I could feel your hot breath against my skin and it made me feel a feeling that was new. A tingling feeling enveloped my body Suoh Mikoto, and somehow there was elation when you touched me slightly right after. Is this.. what you humans refer to as ‘sort of sorcery’?”

Mikoto smirked.

“You’ve been watchin’ too many shows.” Mikoto drawled. There was playfulness even in his voice.

Reishi thought had a point but it was more than that. He wanted to try something just to make affirm something. Stubborn, he followed Mikoto with his gaze waiting for an oppurtunity. When it finally opened itself, he leaned, grabbed Mikoto by the chin and kissed him.

“Now you taste like sake, and your mouth is hot.”

Things were getting dangerous. Reishi stood up and sat beside Mikoto. It got worse when Reishi planted his hand on Mikoto's thigh like it belonged there.

“Oi. Stop.” Mikoto said.

Reishi didn’t listen, he leaned in and kissed him again as if kissing him once wasn’t enough.

It wasn’t enough.

Trembling fingers wrapped around Mikoto’s arm. Reishi wanted to taste him more. Copying the films he saw on tv, Reishi inserted his tongue inside Mikoto’s mouth. The initiative made Mikoto shiver. He kissed him back, now opening his mouth wider to accommodate Reishi’s tongue. Mikoto grabbed him by the shoulders to steady him. Breathless, Reishi wanted to be touched. He wanted to touch Mikoto too. Mikoto caressed his thigh as he inserted his tongue inside Reishi’s mouth.

_You’ll kill me if you stop._

Was all Reishi could think of.

 

\---

 

What he did suprised him. He couldn’t sleep as thoughts of how Mikoto’s mouth tasted filled his mind. Reishi was wide awake. He kept on stealing glances at Mikoto whose back was turned to him. The only noise that can be heard was the howling wind and Mikoto’s soft breathing. He reached out his arms only to touch the tatami floor. He ran his fingers across its surface.

He couldn’t reach Mikoto.

Disappointed, he thought of other things. It was dark already. Everyone was asleep. He should sleep too so that he can have energy for tomorrow. But he couldn’t forget about the way Mikoto pushed him down and kissed him like he was promising him forever.

Reishi turned his back and closed his eyes to sleep.

Mikoto was wide awake however. He had been hurting for a while now. Ever since their trip started, his body ached sometimes. He was wondering how long it would take for the pain that he was feeling to go away. He breathed out. He turned to look at Reishi whose back was now turned to him. He gazed at him, at the shape of his head and the way his blanket wrapped him up. It was cold. The darkness made everything colder. The heater didn't help at all. Mikoto thought that it must be because he was feeling sick.

He didn’t have any choice but to force himself to sleep.

 

\---

 

“Shall we pick this as souvenir for the kids?” Reishi pointed at a bag of local delicacies.

“Whatever. Pick what you like.”

“Hmmm. But wouldn't they be happy if we picked the things they like rather than randomly picking gifts that seem convenient and cheap?”

“Tch.”

Reishi ended up picking a cute lion charm for Anna, bonnets for Misaki, and a bookmark for Fushimi. He also bought a bag of local delicacies and a souvenir for Izumo. The souvenir he chose was sake from the region.

Mikoto took the bags from Reishi and waited for him to lead the way. Reishi was surprised at first, he smiled as he realized what Mikoto meant to say. When he shifted his eyes to the street he realized that they were surrounded by couples. People held hands. Some clung to their special someone. They were the only ones who visited the souvenir shop that didn't have that kind of relationship. Reishi swallowed a lump in his throat, took a step towards Mikoto and just stood there beside him.

“It’s a very active place. It’s nice here don’t you think Suoh Mikoto?”

“Mmm.” Mikoto agreed.

“‘tis nice.”

“There are a lot of people too.”

“Hold my hand.”

“Pardon?”

“So you won't get lost.”

Mikoto offered his left hand to Reishi waiting for him to take it.

Reishi adjusted his glasses on the bridge of nose.

“But I wont..”

Mikoto grabbed his hand, clasped it in his and dragged Reishi away.

“Wait… you!

“Mattaku.” Reishi gave up and tightened his hold on Mikoto’s hand.

While they were walking Reishi thought about a lot of things that have happened between the two of them and compared it to the movies that he watched.

Kissing. Holding hands. Sleeping together. Being together. They were things that couples in the movies he watched to learn about love do. He thought that maybe to love is to do a lot of things with the beloved. Maybe it was just merely physical touch consummated by an I love you, or I loved you.  It was something that Anna had also taught him.

Reishi halted, making Mikoto stop in his tracks as well.

“Have you really never been in love?”

Mikoto wide-eyed, stared at Reishi.

“It’s hard to believe someone like you have never been in love when most of the people in this world are.”

Reishi adjusted his glasses matter of factly, preparing for a forthcoming lecture. But Mikoto cut him off.

“Not really.” Mikoto said as if the convinced himself that he wasn’t feeling strange; that the warm hand clasped in his didn’t give him a false sense of security.

Reciprocating how tight Mikoto as holding his hand, Reishi held it firmly. Mikoto stared right into Reishi’s eyes, holding his gaze. Their faces were close, too close for comfort. In the past, Mikoto would feel vulnerable and claustrophobic, but now, he didn’t. Now, he just wanted to bridge the gap between them and be unafraid of the things that came after kisses. Yet, even then, he was still hesitant. He fluttered his lashes and smiled slightly.   

“The world is weird. Even an angel like you have bad eyesight.”

They continued holding each other’s gaze.

“What.. that is not the same Suoh.” Reishi protested.

“Let’s just go.” Mikoto drawled.

 

\----

 

Reishi and Mikoto went into the bath house together. Thankfully it was only the two of them. They got in when all the others already left so it was perfect.

Reishi didn’t really mind being naked. He wasn't conscious of himself. Mikoto on the other hand was uneasy at Reishi’s lack of self consciousness. He didn’t know that he was visually pleasing and that his body could be something that could arouse. Mikoto was silent as Reishi waded through the water going to him. Mist from the onsen hovered like clouds. Mikoto stared at nothing in particular. He didn’t want to watch Reishi. In order to relax, he closed his eyes. The warmth from the onsen made all his worries fade away. It cleared his mind.

“Suoh,..” Reishi swam towards him. He settled beside him and went down on the water so that his eyes were the only things that could be seen and his head. His hair was getting wet.

Nonchalantly, Reishi placed his hand on top of Mikoto’s under the water. He didn’t know what it was doing to Mikoto.

Feeling awkward, Mikoto took his hand away. It made Reishi turn to his direction with a surprised expression on his face. There was disappointment in Reishi’s impassive face. As if surrendering, Mikoto placed his hand on Reishi’s thigh and felt its soft skin. Reishi wasn’t skinny, he wasn’t that muscular either. Nonetheless, the feel of his skin against his palm made Mikoto shiver.

He had his fair share of sex, so he knew that the warmth that was boiling inside of him could lead him to a territory he wasn’t sure was appropriate. But this didn't stop him from leaning in and kissing Reishi. The kiss was soft and gentle. The feeling of Reishi’s lips on his made him want to do a lot more. Reishi succumbed to the kiss. He grasped Mikoto’s hand and guided it to his cock. Reishi over the span of days that he spent the time with Mikoto realized that he could have human reactions too; that he could feel desire just by thinking of Mikoto touching him. Watching those films made him realize that in this form, they weren't really entirely heavenly beings without any feelings, without any desire. In this form, they can be human like too and feel what humans feel.

He opened his mouth and brushed his bottom lip against Mikoto's. He felt Mikoto’s hand wrap arounds his dick. “Suoh” he crooned as Mikoto kissed his neck. He felt Mikoto’s other hand caress his thigh. Being touched felt weird. It made him feel uneasy and at the same time excited. The kisses that Mikoto gave him as he touched him made him melt.  

He wanted more.

Mikoto sloshed his mouth against Reishi’s, this time, inserting his tongue. He tilted his head in order to avoid bumping their noses together. Reishi felt breathless at the aggression that  began to rise in Mikoto. He jerked his body, making splashes. He wrapped his arms around Mikoto’s neck and kissed him back. Tilting his head and planting kisses on the other’s mouth. Then angling it again to this time insert his tongue. He grabbed Mikoto’s dick. It was rock hard and it made him fluster up to his ears as Mikoto’s desire dawned on him.

Moans were whispered inside his mouth as he wrapped his hands around Mikoto’s cock. He felt the veins that snake up his girth. The warmth of his hands made Mikoto moan again. Mikoto stood up unexpectedly, grabbed Reishi by the arm and dragged him into the bathroom. It would be bad if they dirtied the bath.

 

——

 

Mikoto slammed Reishi against the the bathroom stall. He was desperate. The desire that he had been bottling up inside of him spilled. He wanted to satisfy every drop of lust inside his veins.

Because of the shove, Reishi’s back hurt. He didn't have any time to process the pain when Mikoto pulled him for a hot kiss. He felt breathless and cornered. Mikoto rubbed his lower body against him. As he touched the ridges of Reishi’s chest muscles, feeling their warmth against his fingers, it was as if he was telling himself that Reishi was real. His warm kisses were real. This heat he was sharing with him was real. Mikoto grabbed their dicks and pressed them together. He rubbed them as he licked the shell of Reishi’s ear.

Both felt a pleasure they haven’t felt before in the friction between their cocks

Reishi moaned. Their breathes formed mist in the air. Reishi ran his hand across Mikoto’s chest down to the other’s navel. He felt the ridges of his muscles. Mikoto’s everyday routine of making firewood served him well. A thought came to Reishi’s mind. He wanted to feel something inside of him like those films he watched. He didn't have a vagina, so he was worried where it would be inserted.

“Ah!” Reishi felt Mikoto’s finger inside of him. His deep voice hitched in an embarrassingly high pitch.

“Did I hurt you?” Mikoto said worried.

Reishi couldn’t speak. He could only moan, “Suoh.. uhh..”

Because his body was more resilient than that of humans, Mikoto did not need any lube to stretch him wide open. He made Reishi turn his back on him. Aggressively, he grabbed Reishi by the ass and spread his buttcheeks to reveal the other other’s lewd hole. Then, he mounted himself on him. He thrusted inside slowly at first, gently. When he picked up pace, he pounded hard, making Reishi’s bit his lip. Reishi didn't want to scream nor did he want to moan, “pound on me more.” It was embarrassing. Reishi clenched his hands; with parted mouth and glazed eyes, he felt pleasure weaken his reason.

—-

 

Mikoto gazed at Reishi as they lied down together. Reishi pretended he was sleeping. He wanted to know what Mikoto’s reaction would be after they did it.

“Ne, Munakata.”

Reishi didn't respond.

Mikoto just stared at Reishi. He gazed at the other’s beautiful face. His eyes roamed Reishi’s closed eyelids: Reishi’s lashes were long and matted. Then to the other’s nose. Mikoto ran a finger from the bridge of Reishi’s nose down to its tip. He traced it down to the juncture. He felt the deep dent. He placed his finger tip on it then ran it gently down to Reishi’s soft mouth. At this, Reishi opened his violet eyes. He was waiting for Mikoto’s next move, wondering what he’ll do if Mikoto will put his finger inside his mouth. Mikoto blinked and withdrew it instead.

“s your body okay?” Mikoto asked.

Reishi was a bit surprised. He smiled.

“I'm fine.”

Hesitant hands reached out to caress the side of Reishi’s face. Reishi shivered. The gruffness of Mikoto’s calloused hand made him feel confused. He didn’t want to be so overcome by the desire to be touched that he’ll lose his reason. Mikoto swept  locks of dark hair to see his face clearly. Reishi stiffened. He wanted to say something disagreeable and mean. Yet the only thing he could muster, much to his dismay, was a moan.

He was aching to be touched again. Reishi wondered whether this was also part of being in love. He raised his head at Mikoto and gazed into his eyes. Serious and unwavering, he asked

“Why?”

Mikoto understood.

“There was no opportunity to fall in love.”

_Until you came._

Mikoto ran a finger from Reishi’s arm down to his elbows.

“Soft. You’re feather soft.”

Mikoto pulled Reishi towards him and embraced him. Reishi heard Mikoto’s beating heart loud and clear. It was the first time he heard someone’s heart beat. Overcome by love, he flared his nose to inhale Mikoto’s vinegary scent, to embed it in his memory even though after his task he will forget. He nuzzled his head against Mikoto’s chest and wondered whether this was one of the things people do when they were in love.

 

—-

 

“Mikoto-san, Mikoto-san!”

Misaki was eager to hear about Mikoto’s stories about his vacation. Mikoto felt rather exhausted. He looked worn out. Reishi was teaching little Fushimi about a difficult word he didn't know the meaning of. He was sitting on the _engawa_ while Fushimi was sitting on his lap scanning through the book.

Fushimi was a very shy kid. Mikoto who noticed that Fushimi had taken a liking to Reishi, was quite happy. Izumo prepared lunch in the kitchen. The ribbons of  scent of the ramen wafted in the air, teasing their hungry stomachs. Reishi craned his neck to look up the blue sky.

Anna ran towards them and sat beside Reishi. She leaned in, wrapped her hands around Reishi’s arm and closed her eyes. Reishi thought that a flustered Anna was cute. He smiled, put his free arm around her and pressed her to him.

“How are you Anna-kun?” Reishi said trying to converse with the girl. Fushimi flitted his eyes towards Anna who was holding Reishi. He thought it was weird that Anna was attached to Reishi. Fushimi cluck his tongue and buried his face on his book.

Misaki was still trying to make Mikoto tell him stories about Akita. Mikoto thought; he was brought back to the things that had happened.

Skiing was not really to his liking. He was quite good at it he learned fast, but he didn't think it was something that, like his father, he would love to do. He wanted to try skiing to remind himself of his parent. To feel the things his Father would have felt if they went skiing together. It was so long ago already though, that his need to be like his father had completely faded. His need to know him and make him proud was but a mere flicker of the fire it once was. Time does that. It allows you to move on from the things you didn't think you wouldn’t be able to live without.

He glanced at Reishi. He thought that the things that he would remember would probably be memories he had with Reishi. He gazed at the ceiling and stood up. He lifted Misaki up and went to the kitchen to join Izumo.

 

——

 

Mikoto couldn't sleep. He went outside to get a glass of water. He saw dark wings lie on the wooden floor of their japanese home. He went outside and found Reishi drinking tea all by himself, his wings visible. Mikoto forgot how majestic those dark wings of his were.

He sat beside Reishi. Then, feeling tired, he lied down on Reishi’s lap as though it was the most normal thing to do. Reishi put down his tea and placed a hand on Mikoto’s forehead.

“What’s the matter?”

“I feel tired.”

Reishi combed Mikoto’s hair with his hands. He narrowed his eyes.

“How long will this last?

“It hurts.”

“Let’s go to the hospital.”

“Nah. That’s exactly why you’re here right?”

“Suoh..”

Reishi caressed the side of Mikoto’s face. Staring at Reishi’s purple eyes, he could not resist. He pulled Reishi down for a kiss.

They stared at each other for a while, eyes gazing deep into each other, until Mikoto looked away.

“I don’t think we can go together to Kyoto.”

The morning after, Mikoto was rushed to the hospital.

 

—-

 

Reishi was reading Mikoto’s list. He was wondering why it had come to this. They still had a week left. Reishi gripped hard on the paper. He looked away from Mikoto’s sleeping figure on the bed. There was nothing that was more painful than looking at someone you hold dear in pain. It was the first time Reishi encountered the real face of death. Death didn't bother creatures like them. They were tasked to be the bringer of its news and was a bystander during its process; for him to feel like this was unthinkable. It must be because it was his first time.

He still cooked Mikoto’s favorite dishes for him. It disappointed him every time it would just end up not being touched because Mikoto couldn't eat properly. Izumo told him to rest, but he wouldn't listen. He was persistent. He wanted to be with Mikoto always. Feeling tired, he no longer hid his wings. It occupied the whole hospital room.

Mikoto’s hand twitched. His weak eyelids opened.

“Munakata.” For the first time, Mikoto smiled at him slightly. He reached his trembling hand to touch Reishi’s cheek. Reishi held it and kissed it.

“I’m here Suoh.”

“I’m sorry…. can’t go to Kyoto.”

Reishi smiled at Mikoto pleasantly.

“It’s fine.”

“I’d appreciate it if you go.”

“Nonsense, I won’t leave you.”

Mikoto huffed. His face grimaced.

“Finish your task.”

“But, there’s no point if we’re not together.”

Mikoto smiled. This time it was a broad smile. He was sweating and heaving.  He held his hand firmly to make it known thay he was serious.

“Please.”

Mikoto wanted to turn to him, but his body hurt. He laughed bitterly,

“Can’t even kiss ‘y now.”

 

——

 

Left without any choice, Reishi was forced to go to Kyoto to visit the Fushimi Inari Shrine all by himself. He was worried about Mikoto. Trying to distract himself, he read the engravings on the tori gates.

 

Walking through the red tori gates at Mount Inari, he thought that those people who put those red towers were maybe just as hopeful as how Mikoto used to be. Reishi didn't know the real reason why Mikoto wanted to go to Fushimi Inari Taisha.

The sun penetrating through the towers drew lines and shadows of leaves on the ground. The morning was beautiful, Reishi thought. He wanted Mikoto to see it. Izumo gave Reishi a camera. He taught him how to use it. Remembering the camera, Reishi took it out from his backpack and took pictures. He was going to take pictures for Mikoto.

Reishi felt nervous as he ascended the stairs. He was thinking that he should have been with Mikoto. He wondered whether him going alone would still satisfy his task. He wasn’t thinking about it as a task any longer. That worried him too. Did creatures like them fall in love? And if they did, if they could, would the Goddess allow it? He is but her Angel of Death, he isn’t supposed to feel attached to a human.

When Reishi arrived at the main shrine, there were a lot of people. He went to get his fortune, and went to pray to the shrine, to ask, even though it is impossible to let Suoh Mikoto live. As he wished for it, clapping his hand twice and praying, he felt odd. An angel of death praying for someone; it was such a weird picture.

 

\---

 

The tap of wood against wood as the wond blew filled the air. Reishi had just finished visiting the shrine and was about to hang a wish. He met an old man who looked sick.  Reishi felt something different about him. Dispelling those thoughts, he helped him sit down on a bench. The old man was thirsty so he bought him a mineral water at a vending machine.

They sat together in silence until the old man spoke,

“I never really truly thought time would fly this fast. Do you?”

“Yeah.”

“ _Leading souls into the passing. Into the eternal embrace of the Goddess._ ”

Reishi’s eyes grew wide.

“Don't you know love is the greatest downfall of angels? Love shackles them to this earth.

“Not all Angels fall in love. It’s rare. Maybe of one did fall in love, it just meant they still retained their mortal essence even after hundreds of years.”

“Why are you telling me this?”

“it’s just a fun fact I came to know, my boy! Perhaps to help you find what you are looking for.”

Reishi pressed his lips together.

“What will happen to the angel?”

The old man smiled and patted Reishi on the shoulder and went away. Reishi saw that there was a faint glimmer of a wing on the stranger’s back.

 

\--

 Three days left.

Only three days left of them being together. When he returned, he saw Anna, Fushimi and Misaki visit Mikoto. The children were crying as they talked to their sleeping uncle. Misaki tried to show Mikoto his improved grades and pleaded that he would do much better if  Mikoto woke up.

Reishi didn't leave Mikoto’s side. He couldn’t leave him. He was there. Always. Looking at Mikoto fight for his life  broke his heart.

This was the lull before the storm. He wanted to be prepared for it, but sometimes, no matter how prepared you think you are, when it comes, you still end up surprised. 

Mikoto woke up. He looked around the dark room. Staring at the ceiling,  he felt miserable having to leave everyone he loved like this. It hurt, but he tried to move to get a better look at Reishi who was peacefully sleeping beside him.

”Muna..kata.” Voice weak, he could only whisper his name.

“Muna.. kata,” He said it again as if by calling his name, he could forget the pain for a little while.

Mikoto closed his eyes and remembered the first time he met Reishi. A tear ran down his eye. His soft existence made him want the impossible. Then, he remembered Misaki, Fushimi, Anna and Izumo and how much they meant to him. He was grateful for them for caring. It kept away his demons. 

He called for Reishi again, this time louder. Reishi woke up.

“I.. have a favor to ask.”

—-

“I want to see the stars.”

Reishi helped Mikoto stand. They went to the rooftop to gaze at the stars. The wind was cold and the faint sound of cars echoed from afar. Above their heads, the stars twinkled, as if winking at both of them. 

Turning slightly, Reishi gazed at his companion. He was full of regret and ache. Sadness and happiness were mere words until he met Mikoto. He gave meaning to the feelings Reishi thought will be foreign to him. As he thought of this, he couldn’t help but clench his hands into fists. He didn’t want Mikoto to leave.

“You should have undergone chemotherapy.”

“Nah. Troublesome.”

“But.”

Mikoto nuzzled against Reishi.

“Lemme sleep on your lap.” Reishi allowed Mikoto.

Mikoto’s breathing was slow and his body ached so much. He knew it was only a matter of time before he passed. Originally he would have accepted his fate, but now that somehow he regained the will to live he didn't want to die, his body was giving away though.

“The moon is beautiful tonight.”

This was the closest thing to an “I love you” Mikoto could ever muster. Reishi gazed at his pale face and kissed his chapped lips.

“Suoh,”

”Don’t be sad. This was bound to happen sooner or later.”

”Isn’t it ironic? This whole thing?

”Me feeling such a thing towards the nearing of your end which I have been expecting since the beginning. I am an angel of death. I am the end. Yet your kisses taste more like goodbye than any farewell, everytime.”

“Can’t stop it even if we wanted to.”

Silence filled the gaps that Mikoto’s words left. They were true. They won’t be able to stop it if even if they wanted to.

”Remember the first time we met? You appeared to me as a little creature who got lost, 

“Next thing I knew, you came to me looking this. ‘Twas weird as hell.”

Mikoto’s eyelids felt heavy as he said those words. Noticing this, Reishi carried him back to his hospital bed. 

\--

 

“Munakata…” Mikoto spoke softly, as he tried to reach out to Reishi. Reishi took his trembling hand and kissed it.

“Suoh.”

Mikoto smiled.

“I’m glad.. I’m glad that I…”

And then Mikoto’s breathing slowed down until it completely stopped. Reishi closed his eyes and kissed him on the mouth, and then he saw it, Mikoto's memories flashing through his mind.

In the faded photograph scene in his mind, he saw little Mikoto holding on to his mother, clinging to her. There was a man handing him a toy, him shyly taking it. He saw Mikoto’s child self smile and jump to someone who had been his father.

“Let’s go to Akita sometime and go skiing!” The man said.

Mikoto waited. But it never came. His father was always busy with work, and his mother was too. When he got into highschool his mother promised,

“Mikoto-kun, let’s go to Fushimi Inari on the holidays, we finally cleared out our schedules.”

“It’s a pity we couldn’t go skiing. But we can go another time.”

Another time. That's what his father had always said. Another time.

“Papa, we decided to go to Fushimi Inari right?”

“Oh alright. I was just…”

It never came though. The day his parents died in an accident, Mikoto was in his second year in high school.

The memories of how he met Izumo flashed; how he’d taken care of the kids his own way. And then, Reishi saw, Mikoto’s memories of their time together. Him cooking; engrossed in the recipe book and tasting his cooking; Him reading a book adjusting his glasses oh so slowly. 

It was like watching a movie. He heard his thoughts, how Mikoto was holding back from touching him. How much he paid attention.

And it broke Reishi’s heart.

.

.

.

.

 

It was Reishi’s last chance to gamble. He knew pleading with the Goddess would be futile, but he didn’t care. They could give something up in exchange for a wish. In exchange for their own beings. The Goddess heard him out. She listened closely to his bargain.

When he finished speaking, the Goddess’ emphatic eyes shifted. She replied,

“Love is the greatest downfall of angels.”

Reishi thought the line was familiar. It was the very thing the old man he met at the shrine had said. He clenched his hands.

The Goddess fluttered her eyelids and shifted in her throne.

“You are not the only angel who implored me such request my child. This phenomenon escapes me. For an Angel to fall in love after stepping into the shoes of a human. For an Angel to give up everything including eternity and the privilege of serving me,”

She raised her eyes and gazed at him, then continued,

“Death is inevitable. You are aware of this. Humans die _Reishi_. Even if you spare him now, he will still die.”

“Your higness… I,”

“And you cannot be with him. How tormenting isn’t it? To live while your beloved did not. To be left into a world where both of you cannot exist together,

“What use is there for a life like that?”

“I just want him to be happy.”

Reishi’s eyes were sad. The Goddess was surprised at his response.

“You have it worse than the Angel who came before you.” The Goddess chuckled.

 

——

 

Reishi sat in a bench gazing at the sky. His face was calm and he didn’t feel any regret at what he had done. He didn’t know what the Goddess would do, but he was sure that there was a possible punishment for it. He fluttered his lashes and looked down at his hands.

Orb like sparkles surrounded him. His time was up. Reishi couldn’t help but smile as the soft glow of those orbs envelop him. He thought of Mikoto. He thought of their time together and realized that before meeting him, he was an empty shell only meant to serve.

Brash footsteps, pitter pattering desperately against the ground, interrupted his peaceful thoughts. He turned to where the sound came from and was surprised. The wind blew strongly, making his hair flutter. His facial expression softened.

“Suoh?”

Mikoto sauntered towards him and sat beside him. They were quiet. After hestating, he reached out and held Reishi’s hand.

“What did you do?”

“I have always thought that I wasn’t really fit to be an angel of death. Suoh Mikoto… have I helped you? Did I grant all your wishes? Letting you live in exchange for my life.. interfering… was it unnecessary after all?”

Reishi looked down at his clenched hands.

“I did it for a friend.”

“A friend.” Mikoto looked down.

“No. I did it because I love you.”

Mikoto raised his head and stared intently into Reishi’s eyes.

Reishi blinked and gazed at him purposely, pressing his lips together as he tightened his grip on Mikoto’s hand. He was as composed as before; His gaze calm and knowing but he looked broken.

Looking at Reishi like that, it was the first time Mikoto had the urge to embrace someone. He pulled him in for a hug and held him tightly.

“Stay. Stay here.”

“I wish to. But alas, it is impossible,”

Mikoto didn’t want to let Reishi go. He whispered as he squeezed Reishi,

“You’re soft. Feather soft since before... heh.. I love you.”

Mikoto repeated, “I love you,”

As if the Goddess heard their pleas, the orb like particles hovering around Reishi disappeared. He was still there; his wings were gone and he weighed heavier than usual.

Mikoto smiled and embraced him more tightly.

“Guess you're not going anywhere.”

Reishi smiled and tightened his hold on Mikoto.

“I guess you’re right.”

 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Japanese terms! Just in case. 
> 
> _Engawa_ : an edging strip of non-tatami-matted flooring, usually wood or bamboo. 
> 
> _Zabuton_ : a Japanese cushion for sitting.
> 
> _Chabudai_ : a Japanese cushion for sitting.
> 
> \---
> 
> I love Seventeen (the kpop band). I was watching one of their shows, One fine day (I'm not really sure), where they went to Japan. Ever since that day, I have been thinking of Akita and how much I really, really want to go there. >.< So this fanfic was partly inspired by that series.
> 
> This was supposed to be for Mikoreiweek 2017 but I couldn't finish it because of stuff at school. Knowing how much of an unmotivated person I am writing long fics, I thought I would finish this in 2019, but here it is now. Happy Holidays!
> 
> Constructive Criticism is always welcome. :)
> 
> My twitter is @psychemenace if you wanna connect. :D


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